How Sex Work Teaches Us To Love Our Fiery Crotches: When Weirdness Opens Wallets

"Fire crotch! You're so ugly! Why don't you get a tan?" taunted the ten year old boy in the gymnasium at my Catholic elementary school. This kid was a miscreant full of anger and misdirected self hate, no doubt, but most kids don't realize that hurt people hurt people.

When others mock or hate us, we're not yet able to comprehend that their negativity is self hate projected outward. It's not a coincidence that this boy was adopted and didn't blend into his adopted family in terms of ethnicity or looks. He therefore looked for others who were different and attempted to make them feel bad about their differences by being a bully.

The attributes that made me feel different, my insecurities, are now the aspects that attract others to me. If only that little miscreant knew how my firecrotch and lily white legs are making me a fortune. I'm not the only SWer who has experienced this so read to to discover how that which "othered" us can help us to succeed as SWers.

Many SWers have found that our weirdness, what makes us different, is often what makes us money yet the mainstream believes that SWers must be cis, big titted, and fit certain societal norms if we want to be successful. Read my prior blog post on how weird SWers do very well financially if you'd like to learn more.

Today, I'm specifically exploring how sex work helped me to love myself and my features that, since childhood, "othered" me and often left me feeling like I was on the outside looking in.

Lily White Legs

Natural redheads comprise 1% to 2% of the world's population and when I was growing up, redheads weren't really considered to be all that attractive. Pale skin was definitely not "in" in the 90's and early 2000's. I was mocked for my red hair and porcelain skin, teased about my "lily white" legs and unable to find foundation that was pale enough for me. (This is still a struggle so I mix clown white with the palest foundation out there. 😂) Anxious nights were spent slathering myself in sunless tanner only to end up with streaky orange all over my body. My friends would suntan and I'd...sunburn. It's literally impossible for me to tan.

Giving "Just Railed a Line" in a Peter Pan stripper costume. I can't believe I wanted to look like this.

Tan Goddesses

This teasing may not have bothered a few less sensitive kids but it bothered me. Those of you who are in your 20's may not get it: The early 2000's were all about spray tanning and all of the beauty icons of the day were super tan. Paris Hilton, Pam Anderson, and Britney were all tan goddesses. Getting my first spray tan was like a miracle: Finally, I fit in! Except it began to fleck off in little dots after 3-4 days and I looked nuts so that wasn't the real solution to my need to fit in with the flock. Additionally, the color I turned was orange. Not a beautiful light brown.

Actresses would dye their hair red occasionally but redheads weren't featured much in the media. I remember Julianne Moore and Susan Sarandon being two of the few redheaded icons I looked up to. Sure, a few of the great film legends were redheads but I felt like blondes had more fun and I've previously written about why so many men are attracted to blondes yet many SWers recently have chosen to dye their hair red. This is, in my opinion, due to the emergence of red hair as an actually attractive feature as opposed to a gross "fire crotch" aesthetic that's mocked. Real ones will remember the Lindsay Lohan firecrotch incident that was, admittedly, pretty funny. (Lindsay was also a spray tan goddess, BTW.)

The Outsider

Having red hair back when few people dyed their hair red definitely made me feel like an outsider but my super pale skin was my bigger insecurity and was something others negged me for more frequently. I'm aware that this doesn't compare to actual discrimination: I wasn't denied jobs because I'm super pale.

This was more an aspect that I was teased about and that wasn't considered physically attractive yet there was nothing I could do to change aside from getting constant spray tans but, as I said, those look a bit uncanny. I shouldn't have let other people's negativity bother me but, I'm human.

Behold: She reveals her lily white legs for the world to judge!

The Leg Reveal That Shocked the World

My discovery that being super pale was actually attractive to many because it represents white privilege came very late in life. I'd always covered my legs in stockings of some sort when wearing skirts but last year I decided to bare my legs for the first time ever in a photoshoot. (See the above photo)

I'm not really sure what brought about my sudden jolt of self love aside from the fact that, as I've previously discussed, I was going through a traumatic situation getting harassed, outed, doxxed and more by two narcissistic/sociopathic SWers who now LARP as "pro-SW" online to fool other SWers into thinking their victims must be lying. Covert narcissists are good at that type of thing. Low cunning is their specialty.

This traumatic situation, watching my abusers commit violent acts against me while publicly DARVOing and playing victim, forced me to lose my shit just a smidge and begin practicing energy work out of feelings of desperation and powerlessness. I had an awakening after repeatedly practicing meditation/energy work and I realized, damn bitch, you're gorgeous.

I kind of always knew I was hot but didn't know it.

As I stopped hiding my lily white legs with nylons, suitors popped out of the woodwork telling me that they booked me "because of my skin."

Huh?

I took some new photos that really emphasized how pale I am, almost blending into the white background. 😂 Asking my suitors, "Why did you book me?" They'd reply, "I really liked your skin color." This made me feel gross and I had a light bulb moment; I represent the ultimate in whiteness to some men. These men were often tan or had dark skin: Latino, Italian or from the Middle East with gorgeous darker skin IMHO and now I understood. I represent whiteness.

That thing about me, that physical attribute I hid away and was terrified for others to see was actually a privilege.

Burn the witch. Her delts are too cute.

Fire Crotch Insecurity

The natural red hair, however, is an attribute that I've always known has attracted suitors of all kinds: vanilla GFE clients, subs and daddys all love redheads. I grew out of my fire crotch insecurity at a young age. The insecurity was so real, however, that it forced me into thinking the first guy I got freaky with would laugh at my pubes. No lie. I was shocked when he made no comment and now that I think of it, no guy has ever said anything negative about my poon hair.

I find that the guys who like natural flame heads (and I'm not referring to wannabe redheads whose hair only looks slightly red-ish when under bright lights) are obsessed with us and will do anything to be with us. This is a literal witchcraft/energy work and nothing is a coincidence: Redheads have long been associated with the supernatural and are considered spiritually gifted. Those of us who look different are often uniquely gifted, a concept that indigenous cultures understood but today we find a foreign concept due to our spiritually disconnected world.

Beauty Standards Change But Whiteness Remains a Privilege

"Casper! You're so pale I can't see you. Get a tan. Nasty bitch!"

These are the sorts of things other SWers (or their pimps, I assume) would text me throughout the years. They mocked me for being so pale and, being an insecurity, it stuck with me when everything else from these early SW years is now a blur. Clients never told me that they booked me because they are attracted to very pale women but I think that's because I attracted a different type of client back then.

Ugh. She's so perfect.

Being extremely pale was popular in the early days of the 20th century but tan skin took over throughout the 1960's into the early 2000's. Of course, whiteness has always been valued over all else. Very pale skin became popular again post-Dita Von Teese in the early 2000's as pin-up culture took over the popular zeitgeist.

I've known since forever that white privilege has helped me to make money but I only recently realized that my very pale skin was possibly the ultimate in white privilege, especially as porcelain complexions are something that those who previously tanned are trying to obtain. I came of age during a time when everyone tanned and my pale skin wasn't envied at all. Women did everything in their power to not look like me.

Beauty standards change but whiteness as a privilege remains.

My Bluesky followers have provided me with some interesting insight regarding different personal aspects that they were teased or bullied for when younger that now make them money as SWers. We can get in our heads about that which "others" us when in reality, it's all in our heads.

Inara O'Neill reports via Bluesky that, "I'm really really tall, and being 6'1 and 13 sucked but it's now what makes me unique in the market 💅"

I have heard of tall providers doing very well for themselves, especially if they offer domme sessions. Tall women are hot and have stunning legs.

Trans providers also are able to take what "others" them and financially prosper. Bleezy writes, "My body/anatomy is a bit different. I spent a lot of time feeling like it was undesirable, when it's quite the opposite : )"

A few providers emailed me who wish to remain anonymous and told me that being extremely dark skinned has attracted very generous admirers. A SWer who's very petite told me that she was always made to feel ashamed of her small breasts but now guys book her specifically because she's very petite.

Woe to the Demons Who Fuck Around and Find Out

It Ain't All About Looks

SW isn't all about looks but this is a looks focused blog. I've previously written blogs on how being able to form a genuine connection with admirers allows us to truly prosper financially. I connect with admirers partially through my blogs. I get personal. I talk about uncomfortable subjects and don't pretend to be a perfect human. And I've never been this financially blessed because I'm fulfilling my Goddess-given fate as a healer and storyteller that few may understand.

Yet those who do understand unite with me on a soul level and are extremely loyal.

It wasn't the fact that pale skin and red hair became "cool" that made me prosperous. It was pain and injustice that forced me to face my inner demons and emerge a totally different, utterly self loving person who isn't affected if someone negs me for my lily white legs. However, knowing that lots of people today think my natural red hair and blindingly pale skin are attractive aspects definitely helps.

Additionally, that which I was insecure about was actually a privilege and being white undeniably helps me to attract clients. I don't brag publicly about mutual aid and helping people who are less privileged, but I feel the urge to state this here: All white SWers should be paying forward this privilege to non-white SWers.

All able bodied SWers should be paying forward their privilege to disabled SWers and so on. We're on this earth to help one another and not horde our blessings.

My inability to tan and amazing ability to sunburn in 5 minutes led me to sit under umbrellas and wear hats/sunscreen or avoid the sun so I look much younger than my actual age. It all evens out in the end with the ladies who tanned and were "hot" back then now looking a tad decrepit. (Joking. Or am I?)

Like my Bluesky post advertising this blog if you feel like you can relate to anything I've said or if you were even remotely entertained. I just want to be loved an adored. Is that too much to ask for?

If you consume my writing/content and are a non-SWer, consider gifting me an item from my updated Luxylist or send a gift card to gift_mexoxo@outlook.com. Please be sure to email me if you sent me a gift roseblazebby@proton.me and sometimes, Proton sucks so if you don't hear back from me, email me again from a different email address!