Why I'm Offering a Disability Discount: Don't Judge a Book by Its Cover

Why would a sex worker offer disabled clients a discount? Simple: SWers are business people and we are always seeking to increase our profits. An increasing number of people have a health condition, with 6 in 10 Americans diagnosed with a chronic health condition, according to the CDC. I'm hoping that my offering a discount to folks who feel as though their disability inhibits them from earning money will increase my profits, but I'll explain that later. I also have empathy and understand exactly how difficult it is to live life on an uneven playing field and I want to meet more clients who have similar life experiences/values.

Additionally, paying forward my privileges in life is how I remain privileged. Life is all about balance and if we give to others, the energies of the universe will give to us.

Sex workers usually have a great deal of empathy for disabled clients. This is because, in my experience, most sex workers are disabled. Although we may not label ourselves as disabled, most workers have health conditions that impact our ability to operate within corporate America. Be it depression, anxiety disorders, autism, ADHD, chronic pain/inflammatory disorders, personality disorders, physical disabilities: These are real, possibly debilitating health conditions and working (usually) for only a few hours (if that) daily as a SW is the only way, or the preferable way, for us to live.

Of course, there's no way to accurately survey a marginalized community of workers who work in the streets, lap dance clubs, massage parlors, dungeons and more, engaging in often "underground" activities. We'll never know what percentage of workers have a serious health condition or disability until Puritanism disappears and it's safe for SWers to publicly label ourselves as SWers.

Photo from my mobility aid days. This cane was just for show and was extremely painful to use.

The Fantasy Woman® isn't Disabled

I had to, as usual, learn the hard way to never directly name the health conditions I may or may not have struggled with in the past and present. Some of the issues I have had and still may have are misunderstood by everyone aside from specialists so there's truly no point in discussing it. Additionally, ableism is very real and clients want to see the Fantasy Woman®, not someone who's disabled and fights against themselves daily, hourly, minute-by-minute.

There was a time, before I discovered the powerful healing powers of plants and spiritual practice, when I could barely walk and showed up limping, with a cane, to bookings. The disgust splashed across certain clients' faces and the disappointed energy they emitted upon gazing at my crippled form made me want to curl up into the fetal position and disconnect from reality, which I often did.

I stopped getting rebooked as my visible disability progressed and other invisible issues simmered beneath the surface.

Most guys don't want a dinner date who's in visible pain every time she limps through a restaurant, attracting furtive stares from other restaurant goers. I certainly was never booked for FMTY's or rebooked for extended dates due to the unconscious (or conscious) ableism that occurred back when I had obvious mobility issues.

They weren't seeing me again: My difference made them too uncomfy and forced them to contemplate their own differences. Although my physical disability didn't affect my performance in the bedroom, clients were going to see the dashing able-bodied, limp-less babe who waltzed into the restaurant in red bottom high heels, hips swaying seductively. That is who they pictured when seeking escape via companionship.

Although I was used to the pain/limping and limited mobility and still loved going out/making out, I wasn't the preferable choice. My pain tolerance is and was extremely high and when constant pain, fevers, sweats, chills and more are your norm, you have two choices: submit to and ignore the pain or obsess about how much it sucks.

How Dare You Be Different?

"I didn't know you needed a cane!"

An asshole attorney couldn't stop commenting on my swollen, inflexible ankle/knee/limp and said, "I didn't know you needed a cane!" in condescending shock. This was the usual way new clients would greet me. I then was forced to apologize for myself in an attempt at making them feel more comfortable with my otherness.

The issue that inhibited my mobility also affected every organ in my body, including my brain. I didn't have the ability to upsell, to manipulate, to play the game. My entire body was shutting down and I certainly couldn't work a full time job yet disability pays, what, $1k a month?

Despite this, a fire in my belly pushed me on because I refused to let this thing win. I still loved sex, restaurants, culture and although it was harder to function, I was still a human with human needs.

I could go on and on listing the symptoms that occur due to this utterly common, totally misunderstood and misdiagnosed health condition but alas, this is a companion blog and I'm supposed to be enticing you to book me right now and not discussing unsexy, uncomfy battles that many SWers silently fight.

Something kept forcing me forward, a silently Sacred hand on my shoulder guiding me, protecting me. Touring and seeing admirers, despite my needing a wheelchair to board flights and trains, kept me distracted and there were a few kind, generous, non-ableist clients who made my life as a companion satisfying and fun.

Taking high dose edibles during flights and train rides prevented me from writhing around in pain as every organ, joint, bone and piece of cartilage was slowly eaten away/inflamed.

If you simply looked at me, you'd think I had a limp and couldn't tell what was happening inside my body. I was lucky in that sense. Or blessed.

Like many SWers, you'd have no idea what I was fighting through if you merely judged me from my social media. I was often denigrated as "privileged" back in my Twitter heyday and loved it. I loved the fact that I had fooled everyone and they couldn't tell how decidedly not privileged I was. Obviously, I have white privilege and that has definitely helped me earn money, a fact I discuss in other blogs.

Don't Judge a Book by It's Cover

Once, when I was at the height of my physical disability/mental confusion, I posted on Twitter about seeing a "hot" man in uniform and an e-girl (Let's call her "itssugarlive") retweeted my post calling me a racist and fascist despite the fact that I've been discriminated against by the police (and can't go into details in a client-facing blog). Quite a few SWers blocked my account because this SW Twitter cop, who is constantly micro-managing/attempting to cancel in person SWers from her place of privilege as an online worker, framed me as supporting the prison industrial complex and I admit, it was a very stupid idea to publicly discuss my kink for men in uniform on SW Twitter. Most people understood that it wasn't a big deal but a few people truly were up in arms because I'm good at marketing myself a certain way (and they're terminally online individuals who fall for rage bait).

Anon Twitter attempted to cancel me for saying I was taking my phone number down from ads because I was "out of touch" and privileged. Anons claimed I was "costing other SWers their rent $" and I tell these stories to remind others that we can't judge someone based upon their online persona.

We never know whether they've been unhoused, incarcerated, poor, discriminated against by the cops for being poor/unhoused, or simply have cognitive disabilities. It would be nice if we simply ignored statements we didn't agree with and gave other workers the grace we'd hope they'd give us.

Sadly, the Twitter algo loves negativity/rage-baiting and rewards those who behave this way so that's why I'm on Bluesky!

The only thing that saved my business back then was my innate marketing skill and love of storytelling via images, blogs, and social media posts. I don't do numbers, graphs and statistics: This is purely instinctual and I'm good at it because it's fun to play someone else, the idealized version of myself, online.

SW is my stage and I am but a (not so) humble actor. (Where's my Tony award?)

I also study the art of marketing and branding. Read The Story Brand 2.0 if you'd like to learn more.

Living Life in a World That Wasn't Built for Us

I understand, on a visceral level, what it is to live life in a world that wasn't built for me so I feel it's important for me to be an advocate and share my story even if it costs me a client or two. When you can't walk up and down steps, leaving the house is a nightmare. Most people aren't gifted with the ability to heal themselves and manage debilitating, deadly health conditions. It's my duty to help others, especially those who are marginalized, as the energies of the universe have helped me.

I'm hoping that my Disability Discount and vulnerability will persuade those with disabling health conditions to book me instead of a different provider. Meaning, I hope this will increase and not decrease my profits but I am aware that some people may lie in an attempt to obtain this discount. How to I prevent this from happening? I can't.

The best I can do is say this: I know many of my clients have health conditions but they are, nonetheless, well off. You, Sir, do not get a discount. There are also clients with health conditions that don't really inhibit them from earning a nice income. They don't qualify for this discount.

The only people who qualify for my Disability Discount are those who are not well off and have a serious disability that inhibits them from earning a decent living. I will screen clients who apply for this discount more thoroughly and will require ID, LinkedIn, and after the deposit is sent I'll do a video chat (eyes hidden) to ask about how their disability has impacted them. If I feel as though they're lying to me, I'm not giving them a discount and I can always tell when men are lying to me.

Additionally, if an able bodied individual attempts to scam me for a discount, they're cursing themselves and I'm not joking. The energy we emit into this universe is returned to us. Anyone who harms me or attempts to mess with me has had very, very bad luck befall them financially and health-wise. I don't recommend trying your luck.

How much is my Disability Discount? $100. Email me at roseblazebby@proton.me if you'd like to meet and I'll let you know what information I need to verify you. ID required. Please don't forget to like my Bluesky post advertising this blog post and let me know your thoughts!